Learning as I go

So I'm kind of new to this whole blogging thing. I figured I would try it out as an outlet to vent some frustration. To know what the frustration is about you would have to know my story. I'll start off slow and see how much I can type before the Zanex kicks in and I'm fast asleep.

I'm the youngest of five kids in an amazing yet marginally dysfunctional family. I grew up in California and was raised in a strong LDS home. Admittedly, like many good Mormon girls I felt it was my duty to get married at the soonest legal age and start poppin' them out like crazy and build a little Eutopia of my own with a loving, doteing husband who would bring home the bacon while I reared the kids and made sure they were upstanding God-fearing minions.

The years ticked by. 18, nothing. 19, dry spell. 20, boyfriend but non-committal (typical man). 21, since by Mormon standards I'm verging on old maid I decided to go on a mission and do something positive with my time since I wasn't procreating.

I served a wonderful mission in Berlin, Germany and I loved every second of it, well most of it. I could have done without the pickled hering and pig stomach, seriously.

While I was in Berlin my parents moved to Utah. So by default I became a Utahn, Utard or whatever we are calling ourselvs now (inside I'll always be a California girl though).

So back from the mission I immediatley began my quest to scope out the perfect man. You know those lists that they make you write in Young Women's? POINTLESS, SHALLOW, and UNREALISTIC. That mission quickly became a desperate grab at anything that remotely piqued my intrests. Thinking about it now is truely laughable. I was in and out of shallow relationships faster that I could say shallow relationship. I thought that to have my beauty and worth validated I needed to have someone to be with. I was confused as to why all of my siblings were happily married and having wonderful beautiful kids and I wasn't. So I traveled, I spent money, I went to school, and I made out with random guys with no potential, and I bought shoes. Ladies, Freud hit it on the nose with that one. If you can't find the perfect man you can always find a perfect pair of shoes that look so fabulous and hurt so good in all the right places.

I went on to finish school at the University of Utah with a double major in International Studies and German. So after that I was in charge of the Frosty machine at Wendy's. No, not really, I went on to make a few less than desirable career moves and then ended up with a cute Condo in Holladay and a good job working for the University of Utah. I enjoyed my life but I still hadn't figured out that it was okay to be alone. I mean, I was 29 of course it's not okay to be alone. I was missing my prime child baring years.

I went on a singles cruise with my good friend and shortly after that I met THE ONE. He was the one alright, just the WRONG one but I had my head in the sand and my heart on my sleave. I didn't want to see it. He was smart, awkwardly cute, marginaly funny, and complementary. He said things to me I could never dream of a guy saying before. He told me I was beautiful and how he never loved anyone as much as me. He wanted to be with me all the time, and I him. I was in rapture! We decided to get married and I predicted nothing but blue skies from that point forward.

Stay tuned.... Much more to come